Someone I know was asking for someone to help her with temporary care for her 96yr old mother who has dementia. The adult daughter is going to be having cancer surgery and will need help in their home with her mom while she recovers. When I saw her request on social media I reached out and she was so happy to talk with me about doing this. She is asking for help twice daily (morning and night) to help her mom get up and ready for the day, toilet help( she wears depends), basic hygiene and then again getting her ready for bed at the end of the day. And then any other needs she may need help with while she is down recovering from surgery. This has not been my profession. I have taught little ones my whole adult life. I have provided care for my aging family members but not for pay. I am trying to figure out what to charge for this. She wants me to come up with a compensation amount. I have seen as I've been researching around $20-$25/hr. I was thinking more of a daily rate/fee since it will be going twice daily and not necessarily by the hour. Any feedback is much appreciated! Thank you
Recovering from any surgery is not easy and if the daughter will also be getting medication for the cancer that can wipe her out so even though she is home she may not be in the best condition to help her mom at this time.
So this may be an hourly position after all.
And if you end up caring for 2 that adds to your work.
Now to the reality.
You can't really get into the practicality of this with this person since she is not a friend but if I were this persons friend or family member I would encourage her to place mom in a MC facility until she has recovered enough to care for mom more easily. Or at least get daily caregiver to help out on a long term basis.
Oh, I think you are low balling the amount I would think $30.00 to 35.00 per hour.
And you need to know exactly what is expected.
Can you transfer someone
Can you help them off the toilet
Is equipment being used
What other tasks will you be doing.
And you need to observe daily activities that this person does before she has the surgery so you know exactly what is expected.
IF you try this then you should have an agency on call for back up. What if you become ill? Where does that leave this woman with her surgery?
So I would suggest 35.00 an hour. And a trial run. And overall if you haven't ever done this work, I think you are in for a shock. Be certain there is backup.
Good luck.
I would encourage you to have a day of training before you commit. Twice daily changes of a full grown adult diaper is NOT enough and you will be dealing with complete saturation, urine and feces, of bedding, clothing, floor messes and who knows what else. This becomes very time consuming to clean up.
An agency will provide care twice daily, they have minimum hours required, some 3 to show up and some 4, it doesn't pay the aids enough to show up for less hours. Do you live close? Your drive times and fuel are not part of your care hours, what amount makes sense for you to drive there and home?
I think it is a great way to help and see if this is your new calling, there is a big demand for good caregivers.
I do strongly encourage you to do this for a morning shift to see if you can do it. Me, I can't do the diapers, even though everything else is good, that is a deal breaker. I have seen adults that are leaking feces and fighting being cleaned up, not a pretty sight and not something everyone can deal with.
Best of luck. I commend you for even thinking about taking this on.
Just 1 client with incontinence can be a hard day. Just meals , and keeping them clean is a “ full throttle”, day.. I can’t imagine caring for a 2nd…
How far along is her dementia? How is her vision and hearing? Is she mobile? Can she get in and out of a car?
When we had a neighbor come in (experienced in caregiving) to help my 100-yr old Aunt with advanced dementia with showering, it took her a long time to trust and cooperate with someone she knew in the past but no longer remembered. My Aunt was tall and semi-mobile, meaning she could get up and out of a chair with proper help, could walk being supported by a belt, but had to wear a motion alarm so she wouldn't do it without help since she'd fall (and she did have a history of falling, breaking bones 3 times).
My Aunt said awful things, was stomach-turning to watch her eat, Sundowned every afternoon, and needed to be entertained a lot.
If your friend's Mom has dementia, and even though your friend will be in the home recovering, her Mom may not accept you, which is pretty common with dementia. There are strategies to engaging with people with dementia. The rate you charge should reflect your "companion" level of care. At an agency an aid gets a higher hourly rate for being experienced with someone who is a "fall risk", and rates can vary by state. You can check out Care.com to see what their rates are and then knock off about $10 or $15 for you since there's no middle man.
I would strongly recommend you start visiting so that you see how it goes with her Mom and there's no surprises. Your friend doesn't need to have the stress of her Mom being uncooperative after her surgery.
I hope it goes well!
What is this lady’s treatment after surgery ? How long is surgical recovery time?
I think you are going to end up caring for two patients.
Have you had experience with dementia before?
Can you handle a person in a "dementia loop" without going bonkers? As in "What time is lunch?" repeated every minute all. day. long. ?
Can you handle a person repeatedly attempting to leave the house?
Can you handle someone swearing at you, morning and night?
Can you handle toileting an adult who may or may not cooperate with hand hygiene?
Can you handle it when the patient isn't interested AT ALL in getting into their pajamas?
Can you handle giving a shower to a possibly VERY RESISTANT adult?
Dementia is a WHOLE OTHER THING than babysitting.
A paid trial will give you an indication of what you're in for.
Good luck, and update us on your decision. ◡̈