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My father is in CA in a nursing facility and I am in VA. I would like to hire someone to visit with my dad once a week to help with his shopping returns, organization of his area, and be eyes, ears, and hands for me. I have no idea where to even start to look for, verify, and hire someone that could do this for me and my father. Any suggestions are most appreciated.

If he is on medicaid, you can talk to his DSHS worker, about getting an aide, if he is in a nursing home, maybe ask the office there about how to go about having someone come and spend time with him for a few hours a week, and they may give you some suggestions. My husband is in a nursing home, an hour and half away from our home, I go twice a week, but it is not enough. There are a few things that you need to monitor, ( if they answer the phone, call and talk to nurse at least twice a week, to get an update on his condition, if you can talk to him on the phone, do call. Watch out for bed sores, real problems. Pam Holloway
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The facility where he is at are you having issues with his care? There are churches and senior advocates that can help with dad's outside needs that facility doesn't have enough staff to assist dad with outside activities. If dad is in calif you may call 211 it is a free service for information and assistance for seniors.
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I am not clear on you being in the VA. Oh, you mean Virginia, not the Veterans Administration. Okay ...

This is the kind of work I do although it may not be so easy to find someone. It is a few steps above a caregiver. I offer elder care management which includes a lot of services some social workers would offer, in addition to - for example - pet care, emptying out a house, researching furniture / medical equipment, communicating with administrators (on your behalf)
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- You want someone who can 'do' caregiving and think on their feet, generally be able to coordinate needs / talk to medical staff - as you say "be your eyes and ears" (this is what I do when working with the family unit).

- A huge aspect of my work was writing assessments for the family (contact) so be sure that you include this in the work required. It might be enough for you to do verbally over the phone although I always wrote up assessments after each visit and emailed them. These written assessments were used in MD visits as they provided an ongoing record of what was going on and behavior / mental changes.

I would suggest you start with writing up a short 'bullet point' ad

- Call churches - ask if they could post on their bulletin board

- Discuss / send to administrator in the nursing home in case they have referrals.

- Call the (a) colleges in his area and contact dept directors (counseling, nursing, social work, health fields). Let them know you want to hire a student: BS, BA or master programs that might be able / interested in this kind of work.

** Colleges will also have an employment office - call them to post an ad, too.
and perhaps the social worker in the nursing home where he is residing.

- Call hospital(s) social worker dept.
* There is also an employees bulletin board if there is a way to post an ad there. People / nurses 'know other people' --- perhaps nurses want a part-time job.

- So much of this is referral / word of mouth.

If I were you, I would ask for the following (which I am required to provide working in elder communities)

- DL and copy of car insurance
- Criminal Check (fingerprinting and at my expense)
- TB test (I had to do yearly)
- References (personal and work)

Finally, develop a list of questions that you will ask everyone so you can compare responses. Give them a scenario - or 2 or 3 - of possible situations that could occur and ask how they would handle it. You want to see how compassionate they are as well as how they handle emergency situations.

When you do decide to hire someone, have all the duties and payment specifics in a contract that both of you sign.

* I would suggest you tell person that you want to be sure this is a good mutual fit so ... try it out for a couple of weeks and then discuss.

* Know how you are paying the person (taking out taxes, or paying an ind contractor (which I am).

Let us know how it goes.

Gena / Touch Matters
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LoniG1 Feb 23, 2025
You always have such great answers. I enjoy reading your comments as they are always such a huge help to all that listen. THANK YOU Lonnie
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nlbarry: Perhaps you can have a virtual NH visit.
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I highly recommend looking for a Geriatric Care Manager. Take your time and find one that is responsive and on the same wavelength; they can be invaluable. Here's one place to search: https://nahac.com/directory-of-advocates#!directory
The GCM is not a companion. That would be a different search; maybe try a veteran's association, or the local Senior Center for volunteer help. Or possibly hire someone from an agency.
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TouchMatters Feb 22, 2025
Good idea. I believe a Geriatric Care Manager has a degree - I am not sure. I offer elder care management. I am not sure they are different. While my background is counseling (and certified massage therapist), I do not have specific geriatric education aside from taking on-line webinars for two years with Teepa Snow, one of the country's leading experts on dementia. My skills could be different / broader as I emptied houses for sale / worked with realtors and attorneys. In any case, your suggestion is a very good one.
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I am not certain if this is the type of help your are looking for:
https://www.aginglifecare.org/ALCAWEB/ALCAWEB/What_is_Aging_Life_Care/What_you_need_to_know.aspx?hkey=df5e6b42-a83a-4c62-a543-ce34bacdcee4
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If he is in a Nursing Home, as you live out of state, I’d suggest that you ask for a zoom based care plan meeting to be scheduled asap. And that in the call, to specifically discuss the hiring of an outside person to act as aide or companion for him.

For the NH, there likely would be concerned about liability issues on doing this. I imagine their insurance does coverage if something should happen to famiIy & friends visiting. But what you want to do is different…. You personally or you as his POA are paying someone / employing someone to work at a business which has its own employees. It can be done….. I bet they would require the person to be bonded and have a background check done and be there on a schedule so that it doesn’t interfere with the daily routine of their staff. The NH has more than likely had others who have wanted this and they will have suggestions. Could be a church that does outreach or common organization that does.

The NH has to be involved in the decision making on this as it’s a private entity and can limit access to outsiders if need be.
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TouchMatters Feb 22, 2025
From my experience, anyone (family member) can arrange for additional care for a loved one in a nursing home. I don't know about injuries of that person hired by the family. It is a good question. Gena
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He needs a companion aid. Check out Care.com and look for help in his area, or Visiting Angels, which is a national franchise and may have offices in his area.

But if you want more than just a go-fer, you will need a Geriatric Care Manager. Not sure they'd be willing to do menial stuff like shopping returns and organization, since they are professionals paid a higher hourly rate, but maybe?

Or, you hire a combo of both. Eventually as your Dad declines, he will need more of the help of a GCM being so far away. Maybe consider moving him to a facility local to you to head off the cost of extra people? Do it while he's still healthy enough to make the move. Eventually it would be much more difficult, if even impossible.
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TouchMatters Feb 22, 2025
Visiting Angels offers caregivers. It is my understanding that this writer wants someone with more manager experience and abilities.
Some caregivers are not able to support basic socialization needs (reflective listening, compassion) as they do not have this training necessarily. Many cannot find other employment and doing this work as it is the only work they can do).

These agencies charge a lot of money.

Yes ... I certainly did a lot of varied work as a care manager... like shopping, research, etc., but then I loved this aspect of the care.

Good suggestions.
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Look to hire a geriatric care manager .
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