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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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You asked originally whether your half-brother had any "say" about your dad/his stepfather.
A say in what sort of thing? Are you struggling to make decisions, and looking for his input? Are you concerned that your brother might question decisions you make for your father, or attempt to interfere?
Apparently not. Not only is your brother physically unable to have any meaningful input into your father's care, and dealing with his own issues besides; but your stepfather asked you *not* to involve him.
You go ahead and update stepbrother anyway... Never mind - that's absolutely fine, no problem as long as you didn't divulge any strict confidences.
But to repeat, I'm now at a loss to understand what your real question is. But maybe all you'd like is some moral support during this very difficult, emotional time? That's fine too - come back whenever you like and let us know how you're getting on.
Since your father is "with it" I would say he is really the best person to say whether he wants your half-brother to know anything about him or how he is doing. Regardless of your father's choice, I think you should do your best to honor that choice. I don't really think this is really something that you should decide for him unless he has some sort of capacity issues, which you seem to infer is not the case. Just my two cents, though.
Katgurl, please if you could answer about whether your Mom and Dad had raised your half-brother since he was a child. That will give us a better understanding of the situation.
I am curious why your half-brother's medical condition has anything to do regarding him having a "say" about your Step-Dad?? Is it because he is not hands-on care for your Dad?
No he is not on the scene he is blind and has cirrhosis of the liver and diabetes. And yes I am pos and my dad is quite with it and asked me not to call him but I just thought he should know how poppy is doing. I love my brother but he is not well himself. He has a wonderful wife that makes sure he has care givers when she is at work. He could not help or even come and see mamma when she was dying it was all on me but I feel I got to spend that time being very close to my mom and now with my poppy
katgurl58, as CountryMouse had asked above, how long did your Dad raise your half-brother? Did your half-brother spend his childhood living with your Mom and your Dad? And kept in contact during his adult years. If yes, then definitely your half-brother has a say regarding his Step-father.
Katgurl, I'm very sorry for what you are going through.
About your half brother, can we just stop and think about this for a minute. You say on an earlier thread how hard it is to manage everything alone, and that it has been just you and your father.
So now, your half-brother has entered the scene. When you ask if he has "any say", any say about what?
Also, if your dad helped to raise him, then the two of them do have a relationship.
Can you tell us a little more about what's happening?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
You asked originally whether your half-brother had any "say" about your dad/his stepfather.
A say in what sort of thing? Are you struggling to make decisions, and looking for his input? Are you concerned that your brother might question decisions you make for your father, or attempt to interfere?
Apparently not. Not only is your brother physically unable to have any meaningful input into your father's care, and dealing with his own issues besides; but your stepfather asked you *not* to involve him.
You go ahead and update stepbrother anyway... Never mind - that's absolutely fine, no problem as long as you didn't divulge any strict confidences.
But to repeat, I'm now at a loss to understand what your real question is. But maybe all you'd like is some moral support during this very difficult, emotional time? That's fine too - come back whenever you like and let us know how you're getting on.
I am curious why your half-brother's medical condition has anything to do regarding him having a "say" about your Step-Dad?? Is it because he is not hands-on care for your Dad?
As you can see, we still have a lot of questions.
About your half brother, can we just stop and think about this for a minute. You say on an earlier thread how hard it is to manage everything alone, and that it has been just you and your father.
So now, your half-brother has entered the scene. When you ask if he has "any say", any say about what?
Also, if your dad helped to raise him, then the two of them do have a relationship.
Can you tell us a little more about what's happening?
Is he competent?
Does he have medical problems?