Support

First....
Do you have POA for this person?
If not you are getting into a quagmire. It will be difficult to get and give information to his doctors (even if he has you on his HIPAA forms)
Are you going to get paid to care for this person?
If he has dementia you might be looking at 10 years, 20, 30 years of caregiving. (and if you do not have POA it will be difficult to place him in Memory Care if and when it comes to that)
The first thing is to get him to his doctors for a full exam. And while there make sure that you are included on HIPAA forms. Mention the outbreaks, yelling and agitation there are medications that can help.
Does this person have family?
They are the ones that should step in and make decisions if you are not POA.

I have used the gender as HE since you mentioned "shaving" but if I am wrong..the advice still stands.

Is friend male or female? Do you have POA? Does he have family?

I would call APS. Tell them your "roommate" is showing signs of Dementia. (The incontinence means the person is pretty much into the Dementia) That you are not in the position to care for this person. Their care is beyond your ability. The State should take over thevperson's care if no family member is willing to do it.

I so hope you have kept finances separate.

To solve one problem immediately you may want to consider discarding all his cloth undies and replacing them with disposable briefs.

I agree it sounds like he may have a UTI. I agree that if you can' get him to Urgent Care then call 911 and follow the suggestions that funkygramma59 gave you.

Please know that your condo is his legal residence. And, without a formal diagnosis of dementia, and if he has no family or PoA, then they will allow him to be discharged BUT you don't have to go get him. I don't think anyone gets diagnosed with dementia at the ER, I think this is something either a primary doc or neurologist or psychiatrist does. Definitely talk to a social worker right away at the ER.

Also, hospitals are desperate to discharge patients. They may threaten you or promise to help you "once he's back home".... nope, do not believe this. I had a hospital threaten me when I didn't want to go retrieve my 6'4" SFIL with Parkinsons. They had the Sheriff meet me to make sure he got into the house. You can't make this stuff up. Do whatever it takes to fend of him returning to your condo. Without a PoA your friend will need to become a ward of the court-appointed guardian who will then manage him and all his affairs and find placement for him. But, this may take a while.

If your friend truly does have a UTI then antibiotics will probably be enough to treat the symptoms but probably not his incontinence... you will need to have a discussion about him moving to a facility.

Is your friend a veteran? The VA will have options for him.

Does your friend not have any family to look after him, and who is his POA? If he has someone as his POA(and I hope it's not you)they need to step up and get your friend more than likely placed in the appropriate facility where he will receive the care he now requires, as dementia only gets worse, never better.
And from what you're describing, your friend has way more that just a "mild form of dementia."
You can always call 911 saying that you think he have a UTI, and once he's in the ER, you tell them that he can no longer return to your condo as you can no longer care for him. You say that he is an unsafe discharge, and the hospital social worker will have to find the appropriate facility to get him placed in.
And whatever you do, DO NOT let him drive. PERIOD. End of sentence.
A person driving with dementia is no different than someone driving while drunk or high on drugs.
He's already getting lost, and you would feel horrible if he were to hurt of kill someone because of his lack of judgement and broken brain.
Dementia is horrible, and caring for someone with it, is very hard.
I wish you well in getting the help you and he both need.

Hi Diane - a bit more info would help - such as the following ~

Do you get paid as a caregiver for your friend...or is she paying you rent to live with you? How did it come to pass that you began "looking after" your friend? I'm asking because it's big responsibility to assist someone with even mild dementia. Are any of her family involved in her care?

Has she been diagnosed by a doctor - because she should also be under a doctor's care and advisement.

Looking forward to your feedback!