My mother who is now in hospice care and taking Morphine, Oxycodone and Gabapentin is getting worse by the day as far as remembering many things. As her mind has gotten more confused, she has become incredibly bitter, angry and hateful. She has not been diagnosed with dementia or Alzheimer’s because she's in denial and absolutely refuses to see a doctor for evaluation. She got angry with my sister a few months ago believing my sister took her will. That never happened and I provided her with proof. However, she had gone to see an attorney to change her will cutting my sister out. Her illness progressed and is progressing rapidly so a couple of months later she told me she made a mistake in hiring an attorney to change her will and asked me to put a stop to any new legal documents she had drawn up which I did. She has a signed and notarized Revocation of POA that he worked up for her. Now a retired attorney that no longer has a practice and lives in her senior living facility managed to talk her into rescinding the Revocable Living Trust agreement executed by both my father and mother back in 2003 with their Pour Over Wills when they were each healthy and had the mental capacity to do so. It was important to my father that he take care of any legal issues before either of them became sick or incapacitated. I’ve tried to put a stop to this second attorney because I feel he is taking advantage of an elderly woman who is very ill and can’t think clearly due to the strong cancer pain meds she's taking and her lack of understanding. I was there when he was talking to her, asking questions. She had the look of a deer in the headlights and was unable to comprehend his legal questions and answer them. I contacted him after that visit and explained to him she's in hospice and on a strong cocktail of pain medications to ease her pain as she dies and to please not to move forward.
My mother found out I told the attorney about her diagnosis and that she is heavily medicated. He chose not to take her case because it would be unethical. Mom found out I spoke to him and asked him to back off and now she is furious with me saying she never wants to see or speak to me again. I'm afraid she is going to keep hiring random attorneys who might also take advantage of her situation. I want to protect her from making another mistake like the first time. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to handle in my life!
I am very sad that this is the circumstance for the end of her life. Very sad for her. Really, I am always telling people they should NOT feel guilty, that they have not caused something and cannot fix it. However, it seems to me that there are people here causing a whole lot of things, and able to fix it but refuse to. There seems imho to be enough guilt to go around.
I am dreadfully sorry for your mother. It's very sad.
Please stop bothering your mother about money, wills and attorneys and sit holding her hand while she passes of this dreadful disease. Please let your first and last and only hope be for her comfort.
YOU are the one who must live forever with your actions now. See that they do you honor and you can move on with your head high. Do your mother this honor, if you are able.
No one here on this Forum can make heads or tails of ANY of this. We have your side of the story. But what is certain is that your mother is now dying. Please help to support her with all that is in you.