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I was the sole caregiver for my father. He passed last fall. I am now overwhelmed with handling the process of clearing out and selling his home that he had for over 55 years. Thank you,
Is there anything of worth in the home? If so, could have an auction house or similar org come and go through things. They'll take what's good and sell it and take a %.
For the general cleaning up of stuff, ask around for a local cleaning lady who can help you with the clearing out and would probably be paid by the hour.
You could hire someone to help you organize the smaller but useful items for a yard sale. Or just donate it to a charity if that's too much work (which it often is).
I agree with again but before I did that I would get rid of the junk. My MIL had a closet filled with magazines up to the first shelf. My DH bundled them 20 a bundle. They covered a whole parking space. They went to the recyling place. Books went to the library, some sell them. If old VCR tapes, I would trash. I donated a lot to our Church yardsale and to a local thrift shop. Moms furniture went to Habitat for Humanity. An estate sale co will only take what they think will make a profit. Some auction co. take a lot more. People we know just sold brothers house. Called a guy in and he gave them 2k for the stuff in the house.
I would not do a yardsale. Very time consuming for the money u receive.
Clothes can be donated. Take a room at a time. Not so overwhelming.
Very specific helpful advice. I basically followed his procedure, it kept what could have been an overwhelming meds into an organized project. Not a happy time, but it has to be done.
When I gained guardianship of my father and my mother moved in with me, my parents were cash poor due to my father's bad spending habits as vascular dementia took hold, but they still had several rental properties in additional to their 54 year old home with a beautiful large yard and garden space. Nothing had been painted since I last painted the house during high school summer breaks. Every bathroom and kitchen fixture was original and 54 years old. I had replaced most of the light fixtures over the years after my parents decided they liked ceiling fans. I refreshed the paint in their 2BR 1BA rental house and put in some new commercial grade laminate flooring, then sold it to fund Dad's MC and to pack and refresh the main house.
Some things I packed myself and with help from one of my brothers - things I knew where they were and my mother wanted to keep. Then I hired a moving company to pack or discard things out of closets, dressers and bookcases. I got a better rate because I agree to use their people "as available" when they were not working scheduled jobs. Some days there was no one, other days 1-4 people were available for 2-3 hours at the end of a day and some days I had a whole crew because someone canceled on them unexpectedly. A local charity that resales clothing, furniture and household items came and picked it all up once it was packed. Then I had the movers come in and move everything down from the attic onto the main floor and repeated the process with the attic contents. Then I moved on to the partial basement... Once the house was empty, a house cleaning service gave it a basic cleaning (fast, easy, and cheap since the house was empty). I spent some money bringing the house up to date a bit: a fresh coat of neutral colored paint throughout, couple of new coats of poly on the hardwood floors, a new metal roof, new heat pump, new bathroom fixtures and medium grade closeout kitchen cabinets. Other than the heat pump, family provided most of the labor for the updates (construction is a multi generational family occupation). We had just enough money left to add on a mud room and bring the laundry upstairs (something I had wanted to do for years but my father would not agree). The updates doubled the appraised value and made the house much easier to sale since a lot of younger people will not have the money for multiple major updates in the first few years after purchasing a house and a lot of other people don't want to go through the whole update process.
If the estate has some money, you can use it to hire help to pack and clean the house, even consult with a real estate agent to see if updates would improve the appraisal and let it sale quicker. Some charities may be willing to bring their own people in for the clearing out phase just for the donation of goods. If memory serves, you can even borrow money secured by the house to make updates if all the heirs agree.
fiorini01, not an easy task. Been there, done that. Even though my parents didn't have a lot of "stuff" [as George Carlin would say], it was still an overwhelming job.
One really great suggestion I got here on the forum. Anything of your Dad's you want to keep, swap it out with the same item you have in your house. Such as I swapped out lamps, as I wasn't attached to the lamps I already had, but liked the ones my parents had. I was using old candy tins for paperclips, so I swapped out pudding dishes my Mom had. Even swapped out a couple of wastebaskets, etc.
Bring home all the photo albums, those you can go through later.
I had called in an Estate person but since none of the paintings were Van Gogh, and none of the furniture was from Buckingham Palace, I never heard back from the company.
Call in Salvation Army and Goodwill. Oh, Goodwill where I live still will accept old VHS tapes :)
I hired a handyman that I knew to help me with "stuff" in the basement. He moved it all into the garage. And trashed items that were junk.
A plumber came out to fix a problem. When he saw my Mom's old china cabinet he fell in love with it. The china cabinet now had a new home :)
Then I called the junk hauling. Anything they could donate they would, and we would get the receipt. Anything donated you can use on your Dad's income taxes for next year if it is above the new tax rules from last year. Check with a tax advisor.
I sold the house "as is". The idea of remodeling or even painting was beyond what I wanted to do. A flipper bought the house pretty close to the professional Appraiser's price. Make sure you sell the house within one year of your Dad's passing [my heartfelt sympathy] so the $250,000 allowed deduction can be used to help offset any taxable capital gains for your Dad's next year income tax. Again, check with a tax advisor, as trying to keep up with tax changes is exhausting.
I enlisted every relative I could think of, and some good friends. We had a roll off dumpster, and used it. This was after I had an auction company come in and take what they thought they could sell. Yes I got pennies on the dollar, but it was gone. We left the helpful relatives take what they wanted ( I had already taken what I wanted and like FF replaced what I took with stuff I wanted to get rid of) Our only hitch was the piano.. I called every church and NH in the area.. no one wants pianos anymore! Luckily the buyer agreed to let it stay, her daughters fell in love with banging on those keys! It is hard, but I am not sentimental and was ruthless! Mom and dad came here with a lot less stuff, and mom still sometimes misses something, but knew it had to be done. Just keep plugging away!
If you live in the USA, call an estate sale company......they come into the home and organize EVERYTHING, value or not, price it, advertise the sale and then run it for 3 or 4 days. People line up to buy, believe me when I tell you. If you authorize them to give a deep discount on the last day of the sale, people will come by the droves for cheap stuff. If the house is seriously a mess, they can charge you up to 50% of what is earned. If the house isn't such a mess, 40% is more standard. Look at a website called Estatesales.net for lists of sales in your area, then check out a few to see what goes on. Prestige is a big company here in Colorado and tend to sell EVERYTHING off as they have a huge following (me included). They will advertise the sale as A Collectors Dream With 55 Years Of Treasures, or some such lingo, and everybody and his brother in law along with the antique dealers will be lined up at 7 am.
Depending on which state you live in, there is a company called Everything But The House who bring a truck to your home, pick up the stuff, then sell it FOR you on an international online auction. I believe they also take in the 40-45% commission range. They operate in Ohio, Denver, L.A.......a bunch of different areas. Check them out at EBTH.com
Best of luck....its a big job ahead, I know. I've moved the folks SIX times since 2011, with the last move being this past Weds. The consignment shop wouldn't take a dated curio cabinet or recliner, so I had to rent a Uhaul and schlep it all to Habitat for Humanity. Cost ME a bunch of money for stuff I SPENT a bunch of money For! Getting rid of stuff isn't as easy as it should be, huh?
lealonnie, I shudder at that number of moves!! You are amazing. Thanks so much for quoting these services’ typical take, good to know. ssiigghh over the cost of hauling things of value!
My mom's church had a Mission Shop and she had volunteered many hours to them over her last years. I took out what I wanted (not much!), my niece took what she wanted for her first apartment and then the Mission Shop came and took most of the rest. It was so nice because they knew families who needed furniture and household items, and the Shop sold tons of clothing and shoes (I think they took all her clothing, shoes and jewelry to sell). Can you find a church in the area with a Mission Shop or Mission Committee and see if they want items from your Dad's home? There are also auctioneers who will have an estate sale right at the properly. Whatever is left...call a local family owned hauler to have them take the rest away. I wish you all the best. I had to do this for my Mom, too.
A different approach is to break it down in half. Find an empty room somewhere (friends?), even a shipping container if you have space to put it for a couple of years. Shipping containers cost about $2000 delivered here and are easily saleable at the end. Empty the house, and chuck any real junk as you go. Stack everything else in the store. Then get organised to prepare and sell the house. There’s a lot of work in that, and the sooner you can do it the quicker you get the proceeds. If you need finance to prepare the house, a short time loan is more economic. After that's done, take a deep breath and start work on the store. All the suggested options can be done, bit by bit. I’ve done this four times now, and you have my sympathy.
I am currently cleaning out my brother’s apartment, which is a two BR apartment filled with those white “bankers boxes” stacked 4 deep against a back bedroom wall.
Its absolutely ridiculous.
But nonetheless we rounded up friends to help fill boxes of books I am going to try to donate. I delegated the easy stuff to those buddies of ours that were there to help.
My brother was a hoarder with a bad short term memory. I was just going to pitch them but found some valuables stuck in maybe 1 out of 5 boxes. Which means if I pitch them I may miss something valuable or family related (like old pics of my dad in the Army in WW2.)
Its hard because if you hire someone they won’t know the significance of things found.
If there are any older kids in the neighborhood you can enlist and pay them $10/hr.to haul stuff to the garbage receptor.
I am also arranging the Salvation Army to come in and take furniture, etc. & donate his books which are in perfect shape to the town Library.
I threw away a lot of stuff as well.
I so empathize with you. We (hubby,myself) worked for 6 days straight, rented a Pennske truck & drove furniture from NJ to MD.
We needed a break but plan to return there Wednesday or Thursday this week to finish and clear the apt by 6/30.
It’s a huge PIA. For *years & years* I suggested to my brother than he spend time each week and clear some junk out as I was trying to get him to relocate to Maryland so I could watch over him but that was not to be.
There are certain places you can go to and hire a few day workers to help you get through this and help with lifting. In my area there are groups of people that hang out at that certain placed in the AM looking for temporary work. I would pay them $15 an hour.
If he lived in a house I would rent a dumpster from a company like Waste Management who will both deliver & pick it up when full & pick it up from your driveway. Check if Home Depot can arrange this. It does cost about $300-500 depending on the size of the dumpster.
I understand completely what you are going through. It is both emotional and physically exhausting.
Good luck to you. It’s a lot of work.
I plan on renting one at our house to clean out our basement this year or next.
I come from a family of hoarders, and subsequently I am not a hoarder. I can’t stand knickknacks or too much clutter.
As the Adult Child of a Hoarder, I've had to face this as well. I have a different perspective. The loss of the previous item happens not now when you don't find it before throwing it away. No, the loss of the item happened when your brother tucked the item away into it's secret hidey spot.
Hoarding is a mental illness and the loss of things occurs when the hoarder decides to hide the item. It's not your duty to unravel an unhealthy mind's thought patterns over many years.
You can just dump things after checking for obvious valuables. If you hire out the job, you can tell employees they can have 50% of cash found if it's over 1k in the box and they can ask about any items they find if they'd like them. We hired a fire recovery company and all they did was hire 10 people from a temp staffing office. When given that incentive, they moved fast (but 3 rooms to the ceiling was $6k). Happy dumpster filling!
Wow! And I never thought about ‘hoarding is hiding,’ much as I witness it every day. They’ve hidden it from themselves, that’s the part that keeps surprising me, but now it won’t.
If you can take some time (without adding stress of figuring out how to pay an existing mortgage, taxes, utilities), do so. You don’t want to add to the overwhelm since going through the stuff will bring back memories as you continue to grieve and it will just physically be a lot.
Last month I finally completed the same process after a year (my parents had been in the house for 40 years). My father passed in September 2017, I started my project in April 2018 and sold the house May 2019.
What helped was going room by room throwing out and donating what I could & saving what I wanted. Also I set a REALISTIC goal date for completion and when I missed it, I set another one:). I was blessed to find an absolutely amazing hauling company on Yelp I ended up using 4x over the year project (the last one the day before the final walkthrough). I mostly did everything by myself over the year with the exception of a couple of weekends a close cousin came & move out week 2 other cousins came.
In the end, everything worked out exactly as it was supposed to and I’m grateful. The key is to pace yourself and don’t beat yourself up if it “takes longer” than it should, you will get it done.
You can get help from friends or hire a local estate sale company. Interview a couple and hire the one that “clicks.” I would stay away from franchises because the people actually coordinating the effort must forfeit much of their share to someone you’ll never meet.
it is more than okay if you do none of the work personally. This is just stuff.
There was not a ton of stuff, but it seemed like it. I did it in stages. Kept the meaningful things and the really good furniture . Took loads of things to Goodwill many times. The things that were left, mainly some furniture and some sets of dishes, went to an auctioneer that bought up estates. Because no friends helped, (ha! the thought of that!), and I am an only child, it was a lot of work for me but the estate sale buyer was the most help. The Habitat for Humanity in my area also does pick ups of furniture.
I just finished at my mom's (she went to assisted living). Its tough but it can be done. Any thing you or a relative wants or needs goes first! Take time to go thru important documents, family records. I hired an auction house who picked everything up for a sale (profit to mom's living expenses), a lot went to shelters & her church family, recycle what you can and call a "junk" hauler for anything left.
Angie's list. Twice now (once in Florida and once in Ohio) I've used them for clearing out my own place as I get overwhelmed with doing stuff like that. Both times found someone who was not expensive and fantastic at their job. Price was not bad at all.
Thank you for posting your question and for all the various answers on here. I am taking my mother ( 94 yrs) to her house tomorrow (she lives with me) to begin this process as she has finally agreed to sell her house. I have been dreading this and so worried about the emotional impact on her, but she insists on going.
So. We are going together for 3 days only, for what I am calling the planning phase. Mom's house is in another town a few hours away. I plan to have her designate those things ( probably much more than I'd like ) which she absolutely does not want to let go of. Then I plan to rent a storage unit here in town and hire movers to pack and move. (And I'll take a trip back -- only myself -- next week to meet up with the movers, and any other last minute things needing to be done.
The rest of the items, I was unsure of how to proceed, but ya'll have provided some excellent suggestions which I will use. Mom made it very clear she does not want an Estate Sale, as she does not want people swarming into the house for "her things". But depending on what is left and the fact I will be by myself, I will do what I have to and just fib, if needed.
The realtor (friend of the family) already suggested what to do to prepare to sell, such as a good cleaning, then interior painting, replacing carpet with an inexpensive one, repair an interior door..... that's probably about it. And once everything is out of the house, he will meet with the various workers and oversee that part of it. That is very helpful.
I know this will be hard on mom, but it has been hard on me as well. I have been dreading this for a very long time, taking her over there and that she may have a stroke or heart attack from the emotional part. So, once all this is done, it will be a huge relief (to me) and I hope for my mother as well.
I even thought about selling that house and buying one here so she can have everything brought over and put in it, so she could keep everything and still have her homestead etc., so if she ever does need to go to nursing home, she'd have the house safe and not the money in the bank as disposable income for the nursing home. But that sounds like a lot of extra work/trouble. Any advice or suggestions about this?
myown, I’d make another post for your query! Such a good topic. I too am learning a lot and interacting a lot with this thread. Good luck on the 3-day mission, it will be tricky. I’m having to take a long and circuitous route also... Yes I think, let them find a way to be closer to what they cherish! I made Mom unpack everything and display what she likes after 30+ years being in boxes. For what she doesn’t love, it’s corny but I tell her that stuff deserves to be used somewhere (from Marie Kondo) not just languishing with her.
Excuse me if I'm redundant to the other posts but don't have time to read them all. We were left with a house full of "vintage stuff" and absolutely no time to deal with it. We refused to put anymore of our money into the situation as the dysfunctional family left all the work to us and picked the estate dry of any valuables. I listed the back yard stuff on Craig's list. (couple of pictures on the free stuff listing) A Junker came and took everything for free. (I made him sign a hold harmless in case he got hurt he couldn't sue) I listed Vintage furniture free and posted it on Facebook and Craig's list. A guy responded and took the furniture for donations and in return he moved all the stuff he didn't want to the curb. I listed the curb items on free stuff on Craig's list and before the garbage guys got there it was all gone. We were lucky, but we weren't trying to salvage everything the stuff was worth. The realtor helped us with his contacts so use a good one. Also, not to thwart the process of showing the home we consolidated everything to one room so the agent could show the house. To us it was worth giving it all up, even though it was heart wrenching. Good luck, this is a difficult time for you I hope this makes it a little easier.
Love to see this post and the replies! We still have the house Mom left when she moved to a senior apartment in January. It is filled to the gills. She's too out of it to go through stuff, but too cognizant for me to start emptying (if she goes and sees one thing missing all h3ll will break loose). Periodically I go and group the mass of materials to help stage. I worked with a small senior-move specialist company for the move, with ladies who are packers part-time. When the time comes, that’s who I’ll enlist to work with ad hoc on their slow days - as another reply mentioned - at a slightly better rate than normal. I’m hooked up with a gal who sells things on eBay and intend to get unusual decor and dishware to her. On Facebook there are local lists you can sign up for ‘free, just pick up’ for the tons of TP, tin foil, unopened cleansers, etc. I’ll likely get overwhelmed, so will reread the replies above. :) I like charity organizations that serve directly to the low-income public. Goodwill only when I’ve totally run out of steam.
If you don't have to do anything with your father's house right away...take your time. My mother went into a nursing home a year ago. I only had weekends to sort and deal with her home and belongings. Because it was my childhood home, cleaning out has been cathartic. Every weekend I tackled something else. I had a garage sale as well, priced everything inexpensively, just to get rid of it. Admittedly, I had no real attachment to her things, so it was easy enough to part with them. This experience has changed over time from burden to hobby. After peeling away the layers of stuff-and-things, I've fallen in love with my mother's house! It's been an interesting journey...
My PIL have not passed away but we have sold their house of 50 plus years because they are in an AL facility. It was too overwhelming physically and emotionally for us as well. There are companies that will do this all for you. Come in clear out, save what you want and sell the rest. Best thing we ever did. What city do you live in? Contact a continuing care retirement community. They usually have reputable vendors on their listings. That's where we got ours. Movers and company to come in and do all this. BTW..... they came in and boxed up, cleaned out a 2500 square foot house FULL in 2 days. Very impressive work. Followed by a house cleaner. Prepared house for us to sell. Took a huge burden off of us.
Hire some help. Sort his stuff into three piles: toss, donate, keep. If you feel up to it, you could look into selling some of his stuff but it's up to you. Sort through things one room at a time. Grieve as you go along. Hugs.
See if there are any senior moving services in your area. When my mother sold her home they moved all the things she no longer needed or wanted to a second hand retailer who sold them for her. They did the same as she went to ALF from independent living apartment. Plan on using them again if she needs to go to SNH or passes away
Call a Junk place, Someone who will Pay for these things, Or Have a Yard Sale...Go Slow with this Work, It may seem Overwhelming to you, But the Biggest job is to get through all of those Memories that never Go away. Take the precious Ones, hun, That you Treasure the Most and God Bless you for Looking after dad.
Take your time. Take pictures of each room. When we cleared out my father's home, I went through everything and made piles: sentimental items, things to keep, give away, sell, donate, throw out. Take pictures of the piles. I gave certain things to friends and neighbors who would appreciate them, donated all holiday items for the troops, gave handmade items to friends at his ALF, clothing to the veterans (empty all pockets first), towels and blankets to an animal hospital, furniture to charity, walkers and wheelchairs went to a place that cleans, repairs and gives them to others who need them. Jewelry, just because it looks old and crappy doesn't mean it is junk, look for makers mark and keep those. The most important thing is to take your time and look at everything and inside everything. Some people like to hide things in unusual places, inside, under, attached to the back of things. Don't be so quick to through things away. You never know what is there. It may be junk to some, but there are many memories in that stuff. I have those items that bring back all those happy memories.
If you are physically unable to do The work, there are clubs that would help I am sure for a donation or chance to sell some of the saleable items. Even a church group or boy scouts, lions club, etc.
Our real estate broker was very helpful, as we were selling the house, which was remote from our house. After the initial donations to Goodwill, and some sales on ebay and a yard sale there was still a lot of stuff. He arranged for the dumpster and people to clean out the place and get it ready to be sold.
If there are items of value have one of the companies that does Estate Sales come in and do this for you. You will pay a % but might be easier than doing it yourself. If this is "junk" there are junk haulers that will come in and clear it. If there is furniture but no real value Salvation Army or Goodwill will pick up. In my area there is a Veterans Group that helps Veterans and they need furniture and clothing I am sure if there is one in your area they would love to get these items. There is also a Women's shelter that has a resale shop and all proceeds go to helping Women and Children escaping from Domestic Violence.
Other than those suggestions it is a Roll up your sleeves and see if you can get help from friends and muddle through. Do not try to do a lot at one time it is over whelming. 1 room at a time. I suggest that you do not pack it all and move it to a storage unit because that is an out of sight out of mind situation. But if you have to get the house on the market right away that might be an option.
I suppose the next question is are you selling it "as is" or will you either "spruce it up" or will you "fix it up". If you sell it "as is" since this was your fathers house the disclosure statement will be different than if you were to "fix it up" or "spruce it up" You might want to talk to a Realtor as well as an Attorney before you sell.
I couldn't do my mom's home because I am too ADHD and hopped all over the home, looking at all her stuff and not wanting to throw anything out or give it away. It seemed I was moving one item to another pile with nothing going out the door. I hired a personal organizer who came in and knew exactly what to recycle, give away, how to dispose of old computers and laptops safely, non-profits and what they could use. She gave me tasks and a schedule and held me accountable to get those rooms cleaned out. Best thing I ever did. AND, I got to keep the things most important to me and found things I had forgotten about.
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For the general cleaning up of stuff, ask around for a local cleaning lady who can help you with the clearing out and would probably be paid by the hour.
You could hire someone to help you organize the smaller but useful items for a yard sale. Or just donate it to a charity if that's too much work (which it often is).
I would not do a yardsale. Very time consuming for the money u receive.
Clothes can be donated. Take a room at a time. Not so overwhelming.
Some things I packed myself and with help from one of my brothers - things I knew where they were and my mother wanted to keep. Then I hired a moving company to pack or discard things out of closets, dressers and bookcases. I got a better rate because I agree to use their people "as available" when they were not working scheduled jobs. Some days there was no one, other days 1-4 people were available for 2-3 hours at the end of a day and some days I had a whole crew because someone canceled on them unexpectedly. A local charity that resales clothing, furniture and household items came and picked it all up once it was packed. Then I had the movers come in and move everything down from the attic onto the main floor and repeated the process with the attic contents. Then I moved on to the partial basement... Once the house was empty, a house cleaning service gave it a basic cleaning (fast, easy, and cheap since the house was empty). I spent some money bringing the house up to date a bit: a fresh coat of neutral colored paint throughout, couple of new coats of poly on the hardwood floors, a new metal roof, new heat pump, new bathroom fixtures and medium grade closeout kitchen cabinets. Other than the heat pump, family provided most of the labor for the updates (construction is a multi generational family occupation). We had just enough money left to add on a mud room and bring the laundry upstairs (something I had wanted to do for years but my father would not agree). The updates doubled the appraised value and made the house much easier to sale since a lot of younger people will not have the money for multiple major updates in the first few years after purchasing a house and a lot of other people don't want to go through the whole update process.
If the estate has some money, you can use it to hire help to pack and clean the house, even consult with a real estate agent to see if updates would improve the appraisal and let it sale quicker. Some charities may be willing to bring their own people in for the clearing out phase just for the donation of goods. If memory serves, you can even borrow money secured by the house to make updates if all the heirs agree.
One really great suggestion I got here on the forum. Anything of your Dad's you want to keep, swap it out with the same item you have in your house. Such as I swapped out lamps, as I wasn't attached to the lamps I already had, but liked the ones my parents had. I was using old candy tins for paperclips, so I swapped out pudding dishes my Mom had. Even swapped out a couple of wastebaskets, etc.
Bring home all the photo albums, those you can go through later.
I had called in an Estate person but since none of the paintings were Van Gogh, and none of the furniture was from Buckingham Palace, I never heard back from the company.
Call in Salvation Army and Goodwill. Oh, Goodwill where I live still will accept old VHS tapes :)
I hired a handyman that I knew to help me with "stuff" in the basement. He moved it all into the garage. And trashed items that were junk.
A plumber came out to fix a problem. When he saw my Mom's old china cabinet he fell in love with it. The china cabinet now had a new home :)
Then I called the junk hauling. Anything they could donate they would, and we would get the receipt. Anything donated you can use on your Dad's income taxes for next year if it is above the new tax rules from last year. Check with a tax advisor.
I sold the house "as is". The idea of remodeling or even painting was beyond what I wanted to do. A flipper bought the house pretty close to the professional Appraiser's price. Make sure you sell the house within one year of your Dad's passing [my heartfelt sympathy] so the $250,000 allowed deduction can be used to help offset any taxable capital gains for your Dad's next year income tax. Again, check with a tax advisor, as trying to keep up with tax changes is exhausting.
Depending on which state you live in, there is a company called Everything But The House who bring a truck to your home, pick up the stuff, then sell it FOR you on an international online auction. I believe they also take in the 40-45% commission range. They operate in Ohio, Denver, L.A.......a bunch of different areas. Check them out at EBTH.com
Best of luck....its a big job ahead, I know. I've moved the folks SIX times since 2011, with the last move being this past Weds. The consignment shop wouldn't take a dated curio cabinet or recliner, so I had to rent a Uhaul and schlep it all to Habitat for Humanity. Cost ME a bunch of money for stuff I SPENT a bunch of money For! Getting rid of stuff isn't as easy as it should be, huh?
Its absolutely ridiculous.
But nonetheless we rounded up friends to help fill boxes of books I am going to try to donate. I delegated the easy stuff to those buddies of ours that were there to help.
My brother was a hoarder with a bad short term memory. I was just going to pitch them but found some valuables stuck in maybe 1 out of 5 boxes. Which means if I pitch them I may miss something valuable or family related (like old pics of my dad in the Army in WW2.)
Its hard because if you hire someone they won’t know the significance of things found.
If there are any older kids in the neighborhood you can enlist and pay them $10/hr.to haul stuff to the garbage receptor.
I am also arranging the Salvation Army to come in and take furniture, etc. & donate his books which are in perfect shape to the town Library.
I threw away a lot of stuff as well.
I so empathize with you. We (hubby,myself) worked for 6 days straight, rented a Pennske truck & drove furniture from NJ to MD.
We needed a break but plan to return there Wednesday or Thursday this week to finish and clear the apt by 6/30.
It’s a huge PIA. For *years & years* I suggested to my brother than he spend time each week and clear some junk out as I was trying to get him to relocate to Maryland so I could watch over him but that was not to be.
There are certain places you can go to and hire a few day workers to help you get through this and help with lifting. In my area there are groups of people that hang out at that certain placed in the AM looking for temporary work. I would pay them $15 an hour.
If he lived in a house I would rent a dumpster from a company like Waste Management who will both deliver & pick it up when full & pick it up from your driveway. Check if Home Depot can arrange this. It does cost about $300-500 depending on the size of the dumpster.
I understand completely what you are going through. It is both emotional and physically exhausting.
Good luck to you. It’s a lot of work.
I plan on renting one at our house to clean out our basement this year or next.
I come from a family of hoarders, and subsequently I am not a hoarder. I can’t stand knickknacks or too much clutter.
I can totally relate to that. Get that dumpster, and a couple of strong guys, and toss, toss toss. Personally I cannot handle clutter at all.
Hoarding is a mental illness and the loss of things occurs when the hoarder decides to hide the item. It's not your duty to unravel an unhealthy mind's thought patterns over many years.
You can just dump things after checking for obvious valuables. If you hire out the job, you can tell employees they can have 50% of cash found if it's over 1k in the box and they can ask about any items they find if they'd like them. We hired a fire recovery company and all they did was hire 10 people from a temp staffing office. When given that incentive, they moved fast (but 3 rooms to the ceiling was $6k). Happy dumpster filling!
Last month I finally completed the same process after a year (my parents had been in the house for 40 years). My father passed in September 2017, I started my project in April 2018 and sold the house May 2019.
What helped was going room by room throwing out and donating what I could & saving what I wanted. Also I set a REALISTIC goal date for completion and when I missed it, I set another one:). I was blessed to find an absolutely amazing hauling company on Yelp I ended up using 4x over the year project (the last one the day before the final walkthrough). I mostly did everything by myself over the year with the exception of a couple of weekends a close cousin came & move out week 2 other cousins came.
In the end, everything worked out exactly as it was supposed to and I’m grateful. The key is to pace yourself and don’t beat yourself up if it “takes longer” than it should, you will get it done.
it is more than okay if you do none of the work personally. This is just stuff.
So. We are going together for 3 days only, for what I am calling the planning phase. Mom's house is in another town a few hours away. I plan to have her designate those things ( probably much more than I'd like ) which she absolutely does not want to let go of. Then I plan to rent a storage unit here in town and hire movers to pack and move. (And I'll take a trip back -- only myself -- next week to meet up with the movers, and any other last minute things needing to be done.
The rest of the items, I was unsure of how to proceed, but ya'll have provided some excellent suggestions which I will use. Mom made it very clear she does not want an Estate Sale, as she does not want people swarming into the house for "her things". But depending on what is left and the fact I will be by myself, I will do what I have to and just fib, if needed.
The realtor (friend of the family) already suggested what to do to prepare to sell, such as a good cleaning, then interior painting, replacing carpet with an inexpensive one, repair an interior door..... that's probably about it. And once everything is out of the house, he will meet with the various workers and oversee that part of it. That is very helpful.
I know this will be hard on mom, but it has been hard on me as well. I have been dreading this for a very long time, taking her over there and that she may have a stroke or heart attack from the emotional part. So, once all this is done, it will be a huge relief (to me) and I hope for my mother as well.
I even thought about selling that house and buying one here so she can have everything brought over and put in it, so she could keep everything and still have her homestead etc., so if she ever does need to go to nursing home, she'd have the house safe and not the money in the bank as disposable income for the nursing home. But that sounds like a lot of extra work/trouble. Any advice or suggestions about this?
We were left with a house full of "vintage stuff" and absolutely no time to deal with it. We refused to put anymore of our money into the situation as the dysfunctional family left all the work to us and picked the estate dry of any valuables. I listed the back yard stuff on Craig's list. (couple of pictures on the free stuff listing) A Junker came and took everything for free. (I made him sign a hold harmless in case he got hurt he couldn't sue) I listed Vintage furniture free and posted it on Facebook and Craig's list. A guy responded and took the furniture for donations and in return he moved all the stuff he didn't want to the curb. I listed the curb items on free stuff on Craig's list and before the garbage guys got there it was all gone. We were lucky, but we weren't trying to salvage everything the stuff was worth. The realtor helped us with his contacts so use a good one. Also, not to thwart the process of showing the home we consolidated everything to one room so the agent could show the house. To us it was worth giving it all up, even though it was heart wrenching. Good luck, this is a difficult time for you I hope this makes it a little easier.
Take the precious Ones, hun, That you Treasure the Most and God Bless you for Looking after dad.
If this is "junk" there are junk haulers that will come in and clear it.
If there is furniture but no real value Salvation Army or Goodwill will pick up. In my area there is a Veterans Group that helps Veterans and they need furniture and clothing I am sure if there is one in your area they would love to get these items. There is also a Women's shelter that has a resale shop and all proceeds go to helping Women and Children escaping from Domestic Violence.
Other than those suggestions it is a Roll up your sleeves and see if you can get help from friends and muddle through. Do not try to do a lot at one time it is over whelming. 1 room at a time. I suggest that you do not pack it all and move it to a storage unit because that is an out of sight out of mind situation. But if you have to get the house on the market right away that might be an option.
I suppose the next question is are you selling it "as is" or will you either "spruce it up" or will you "fix it up".
If you sell it "as is" since this was your fathers house the disclosure statement will be different than if you were to "fix it up" or "spruce it up" You might want to talk to a Realtor as well as an Attorney before you sell.