Dad is acting up because his rental will be ready in a little over a week. As you all forewarned me, he is fussing about it. He doesn't want to leave my house, which he just came here and never left. He suddenly is acting like he is having more difficulty walking. Says his legs feel like lead weight. Then holding his hands saying the neuropathy is hurting. I asked if he needed to seek medical attention, but he refused. Now he claims he is sick to his stomach, and won't eat lunch. His glucose level is fine. I feel he is basically trying to pretend he is worse off than he is, thinking we will suddenly ask him to stay here permanently, even though we've explained over & over why he cannot live with us.
Does your dad drive? Will he be doing his own shopping or is he dependent on you? If he doesn’t drive, you may be able to get home health for him. This would give him a little looking after by a nurse and could get him some therapy for his mobility issues. They would set up his pill planner, take his vitals etc. if he adjusts well, then he may only need one certification period. Call his doctor and see if they will order HH for him.
if I were you, I would expect some decline. This will be a big change for him but hopefully he will rebound.
My Dad was a Curmudgeon we loved. I had to take him to a vein Dr for his legs. He had to sit before we even got to the elevator. In the elevator he hung on the rails for dear life. TG the door to the doctors office was 10 ft away. Nope, he would use a walker. I told him if he wanted me to drive him again, he would use a walker. I got one from work. He used it but handed it back to me when he got home.
Ok, so he doesn't want to eat a lunch, let it be, put it in refrigerator and tell him it is there to eat when he is ready.
You've got this, you've set your boundaries now stick to them.
Try now to begin the separation he is going to HAVE TO adjust to. If he doesn't want to eat, that's fine. Just tell him "Let me know if you want it a bit later, it's on the left shelf in a container; be sure to check your sugars, Dad".
This may be a conscious action or a subconscious action, but dad will now have to learn to function on his own. Importantly you will have to insist that he does so, ALLOW HIM TO DO SO. He knows the number for his MD. He knows how to check his sugar.
Simply matter of factly move on. And don't be surprised if this escalates a bit. This is hard for him, but what you are missing is that it is HARD FOR YOU ALSO to give up the control you have gradually taken on.
I wish you the best. You're a smart gal, like I said--you got this.