One is in hospital, the other in a temp nursing home. They want to go to their home upon discharge. They have dementia also. Home Care is not an option (they fire them). I do not have any formal or legal control over their discussion. They are insisting they be released under their terms of future care and residence. HOME is their plan. We have an assisted living facility picked out for them. My mom has viewed it. However, she is steadfast in thinking she can take care of them both at home... regardless of Peofessional/Dr advice.
And please keep us updated as to how this goes. You know that their discharge to home can in no way work, no matter what they tell the discharge people. Make sure everyone hears it often that there is no help for them at home, and that your mother fires any caregiver that's been previously hired.
Exactly. If they are legally competent, they are responsible....NOT YOU.
When you say "we" is it you and your sibling(s)?
If you go and pick up the pieces of their inevitable catastrophes, this will not work. You MUST detach and let them fail.
The only thing I can suggest is that you and others do not make up for what they can no longer do, if they are truly independent, they will do their own shopping, doctors visits, cooking and so on. Non compliance on your part, will force the issue.
I would also try to get them to get all their legal documents in order.
Good Luck!