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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Sebring: If you're looking for someone to take over managing day-to-day finances for your dad (bill paying, etc.), consult the American Association of Daily Money Managers It's what they do! You can search by zip to find someone in your area.
(Full disclosure: I run a daily money management company in DC, MD, VA, and NC.)
sebring, I know it doesn't do any good to tell you it's the disease, BUT ---
Keep in mind they will drive us to our early deaths and then wonder why we don't come around for more abuse anymore.
"Where the heck are they?" "Uh, they died, Gramps. Don't you remember? We buried them yesterday!" "But, where the heck are they? I have a zinger of an insult for 'em today!"
~ The road goes on forever and the party never ends!
i want an outside person to take over dads money because he is bouncing checks and blaming me! i dont touch his checkbook, i had one credit card that i paid $300 on everymonth ( minimum payment was only $30. but i would pay $300 because he didnt pay it for 4 months, and i didnt know..now i pay with money order recieps) but im getting blamed and i dont touch any of his money... apperently he thought i spend too much on medication when i got cancer and needed a hysterctomy and overie removal,,so he canceled my card 'because im costing him too much'..huh? i paid triple the minimum every month, i have reciepts. hes got omaha steaks in the freezer, and IM costing him money? since my surgery ive had no appitite at all. i am sick of him trash talking me and people happy to think the worst of me, ive never stolen or used anybody, i take pride in myself for not being greedy, and this is shattering.. other junk going on too, sorry to hijack your thread, i just found out more crap hes done to me behind my back..i am shocked, im floored that he has turned on me, ..im sorry, im rambling
Ego joe, if your folks are of sound mind, I don't think you can do anything. It is their money to do with as they wish. It is really not helping your brother for them to indulge him, but that's their call to make. Suggestion number one above sounds like a good idea, but I am guessing your folks won't go for it. Canyou mention your concerns to your folks? Maybe they have more money than you think and can afford to keep indulging your brother as well as take care of themselves. Ljbjpb, not sure if you are saying your folks will not be able to stay in assisted living without more income (first comment) or if they need money for personal care (second comment). Big diff. Is it possible your bro. Is concerned that they will need the proceeds from their house's sale to stay in their present home should their savings be depleted? If your parents are doing without things they need or want, it might be worthwhile to sell the house for less than one would like. Otherwise, it might be best to sit tight and see if the housing market picks up.
My parents are elderly but they are well, self sufficient and living in their own home - the concern is that my brother is slowly depleting their savings in order to maintain his "phony" lifestyle.
ljbjpb: If your parents need more money for personal care items, then why not dig down into your own jeans and come up with this small amount of cash to cover thier needs. The sale of their home is overkill.
If your parents died tomorrow, your brother would sell their house, and you and your brother would received the proceeds, correct? I assume that your parents income ( Social Security, Pensions and IRA Distributions, etc.) are the sole support of them while they are in Assisted Living. Correct? Why do they need more money that this? To answer your Q: No, there is no one who can force your brother to sell your parents house, other than your parents.(the owners).
My brother is trustee of my parents trust. They are in assisted living now and need more money for their care. He refuses to sell their home because of the down real estate market. He wants to protect their investment. Without the sell of their home, they will not be able to afford the assisted living home. I think he is trying to preserve his inheritance. He has already spent all their savings on the upkeep of their home. Is there anyone who can force him to put the home up for sale.
1) Enlist the help of an outside professional, such as a Daily Money Manager,Financial Planner, or Geriatric Care Manager. These professionals often deter grabby children from getting the money because just their mere presence means that the children know someone is looking.
2) Tie up excess cash in safe, illiquid assets. If the parents have more cash lying around than they need, it makes sense to invest it in low-risk, illiquid assets such as CDs or short-term bonds. It can be set up so that the CDs or bonds mature on a set schedule so that only enough funds for monthly expenses are available.
3) Set up a trust with someone other than the parents as trustee. Contrary to popular belief, most trusts are not expensive to establish. The trustees will have full discretion over the disbersement of funds. This strategy is really only helpful if the parents are willing to cede control of the funds, and most are not if they are still cognitively "with it."
4) If you believe that there is fraud, exploitation, or undue influence taking place, you can file an anonymous report with Adult Protective Services for them to investigate.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
(Full disclosure: I run a daily money management company in DC, MD, VA, and NC.)
Keep in mind they will drive us to our early deaths and then wonder why we don't come around for more abuse anymore.
"Where the heck are they?"
"Uh, they died, Gramps. Don't you remember? We buried them yesterday!"
"But, where the heck are they? I have a zinger of an insult for 'em today!"
~ The road goes on forever and the party never ends!
apperently he thought i spend too much on medication when i got cancer and needed a hysterctomy and overie removal,,so he canceled my card 'because im costing him too much'..huh? i paid triple the minimum every month, i have reciepts. hes got omaha steaks in the freezer, and IM costing him money? since my surgery ive had no appitite at all.
i am sick of him trash talking me and people happy to think the worst of me, ive never stolen or used anybody, i take pride in myself for not being greedy, and this is shattering.. other junk going on too, sorry to hijack your thread, i just found out more crap hes done to me behind my back..i am shocked, im floored that he has turned on me, ..im sorry, im rambling
Ljbjpb, not sure if you are saying your folks will not be able to stay in assisted living without more income (first comment) or if they need money for personal care (second comment). Big diff. Is it possible your bro. Is concerned that they will need the proceeds from their house's sale to stay in their present home should their savings be depleted? If your parents are doing without things they need or want, it might be worthwhile to sell the house for less than one would like. Otherwise, it might be best to sit tight and see if the housing market picks up.
I assume that your parents income ( Social Security, Pensions and IRA Distributions, etc.) are the sole support of them while they are in Assisted Living. Correct? Why do they need more money that this?
To answer your Q: No, there is no one who can force your brother to sell your parents house, other than your parents.(the owners).
1) Enlist the help of an outside professional, such as a Daily Money Manager,Financial Planner, or Geriatric Care Manager. These professionals often deter grabby children from getting the money because just their mere presence means that the children know someone is looking.
2) Tie up excess cash in safe, illiquid assets. If the parents have more cash lying around than they need, it makes sense to invest it in low-risk, illiquid assets such as CDs or short-term bonds. It can be set up so that the CDs or bonds mature on a set schedule so that only enough funds for monthly expenses are available.
3) Set up a trust with someone other than the parents as trustee. Contrary to popular belief, most trusts are not expensive to establish. The trustees will have full discretion over the disbersement of funds. This strategy is really only helpful if the parents are willing to cede control of the funds, and most are not if they are still cognitively "with it."
4) If you believe that there is fraud, exploitation, or undue influence taking place, you can file an anonymous report with Adult Protective Services for them to investigate.