There is always a catastrophe when I'm at my Mom's house. She has dementia. Either the washing machine isn't working right or there's a plumbing issue or the phone doesn't work. Nothing is broken. Everything works fine. Has anyone else experienced this as a caregiver?
I tell her that I will look at the problem then I tell her that I've fixed it. Then she'll come up with another issue.
Is this a common thing that happens with dementia?
- claims of things having broken when she couldn’t recall how to work them
- claims of things having broken for attention seeking
If we dared to have guests over or plans, she would fabricate a crisis. It was interesting how things typically “broke” while we were busy with something else. Or if I was injured, she suddenly had a much worse, yet mysteriously invisible injury. We figured she tested the waters to see if we’d still spring into action. She’s now in care.
Yes, it is common with dementia. Your Mom can't figure out why she can't get her familiar appliances to work, so the answer for her is that they are broken, not her.
Get her on meds and hopefully that will help. If she brings up broken appliances, try to distract her, redirect the conversation or walk away. Don't engage in pointless conversations. If she's doing things like melting pots on her stove or things in her microwave, then maybe it's time for AL or MC.
At least in a long term care facility, you have other aides available who can assist with these clients.
My biggest fear was this client getting disoriented and falling down the steps to her basement since she would get up and wander around the house after my shift ended. I would turn back her bed, get her in her pajamas, teeth care and other evening duties before leaving.
My mind was never at ease. One time I found a stack of paper near her space heater when I arrived for my shift. The kitchen was in an upheaval from her rummaging through paperwork and other trash she had saved. I had to clean up a mess while she yelled and screamed before I could even start cooking.
It's obvious that your mom should no longer be living by herself, and needs to placed in a memory care facility, where she will be kept safe, and won't have to worry about what's working and what's not in her house, and where you don't have to keep running over there for these non issues.
It will be a win win for all involved.