Mum has started in oct 24 saying her hair straighteners are missing and her rosary beads. We couldn’t find them and still can’t. She says she can hear someone in her loft. She says they the ‘man’ is using her washing machine and living in the loft. She has locks now on all doors n windows have been strung up so ‘he’ can’t get in! We at first said there’s no one. She gets defensive. Her memory is fine and she’s functioning well it’s just this ‘man’ then she says he’s drawing on her carpets and her black tops!She has called the police as she said that there was a bag of cat poo on her bedroom window n a pair of white gloves. We said did she keep them n she said no she got rid of them. The police came n said yo my sister that there’s no way or no sign of anyone getting in. mum lives on her own n my sister stays 3 nights with her due to work as well. My sister spoke to her doc and two rapid response nurse came at different times n said mum was fine! Thd doc now says he can’t discuss mums medical details unless he has her permission. Mum says she doesn’t need to. just don’t know what to do?
When that is legally and medically the case, then that's your answer.
Give her doctor your phone number and tell him/her you are stepping away after being reassured that she's "just fine".
If mum has been assessed by full physical workup by her MD and is assessed as well, then her care is between herself and her doctor.
As nothing is being shared with you in any detail then I would step away.
You cannot do anything with someone who is well.
But I wonder about your MD and their physicals, because this sounds a lot like the hallucinations typical to Lewy's Bodies Dementia.
If there is history of mental illness then likely this is due to that.
There really are not good answers to mental illness. They cannot be protected, often will not take their medications, and the laws apparently EVERYWHERE are that you cannot interfere.
To be honest, I wouldn't try. I would simply step away. You have already tried and been met with a complete roadblock. That's the time to steer the car around and exit the premises. Not everything can be fixed.
Sadly your mum now has some form of dementia and you and your family members and her doctors being in denial about that isn't going to help anyone, but will in the long run hurt your mum.
So read up on paranoia and dementia and you will see your mum as a prime example of what that looks like.
Then try to talk mom into making one of you( moms children) POA, that way you can talk to doctors. Also you can write a letter to the doctors, explaining to them what you see. They won't reply but at least they may have a better understanding of what's going on.
I'm also wondering if mom has mentioned dreams? My dad has really vivid dreams, and would get day time , mixed up with his dreams at night. That's a start for now, I'm sure others will give you some good advice too