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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I thought I had it bad with mom in my home for 15 years but you beat me!
I am so sorry. You have your hands full.
My caregiving days to my mom are over. I had to forgo it all. It became too much. She is now under hospice care and lives with a sibling.
My husband was loving and supportive. He isn’t one to complain much, never has been but I could see relief when mom moved out. It is normal for a spouse to start to resent the situation.
I feel like all marriages take a hit when a parent moves in.
My mom hasn't been well for most of her life and has been living with me for over 30 years, she's in her 80's now. She used to be able to manage on her own with little assistance/support but now she is bedridden and needs round the clock care.
I met my husband and got married about 15 years ago. He knew at the time that me and mom were a package deal. She needed care and I was her caregiver. He had no issues at first and moved in with us.
Now it's a totally different story - I think he's jealous of her, my care for her and the time I spend on/with her - everything is "you and your mother". I can't depend on him for any help whatsoever as someone said to me "hey it's not his mom"...... I do understand that but figure that even if he doesn't want to help her, doesn't he want to help me his wife...... I suppose not..... I'm on my own. She can't be left alone so if I have to go out I have to get someone to be with her even if he is at home. Luckily I work from home so I'm basically here with her all the time 24/7.
Me being mom's caregiver has affected our relationship. I'm unable to travel with my husband or go out and socialize with him because I have no one to leave her with. He's gone away on vacation a few times over the years without me. He might mind alot but me not so much. I'm a little anti social and don't mind staying home. As a matter of fact, looking after my mom has given me the perfect excuse to stay home (don't tell him - smile). Not sure how I'll get around this when she's gone....sigh.
Since covid I don't think he's been in my moms room, that's like from March. I don't mind really because even with covid he still likes to go out and he's anti mask and likes to cough and sneeze all over the place. So much so that I wear a mask 90% of the time when I'm at home just because I don't want to get anything from him and pass to her... not covid, not the cold, flu anything. I do ask him to be mindful of the fact that covid or even the flu could be fatal for her but he thinks he's invincible, insensitive and irresponsible and selfish. I'm happy now to keep him away from her to ensure she doesn't get sick.
I suppose I am the good daughter and bad wife..............
The way I see it, mom has been there all my life even when she was ill and could have given up on us. We didn't have a lot growing up but she always made sure we had what we needed and were cared for and loved. Now that she needs me, I will be there for her..... she will always be my mom. He may not always be my husband.............
Mark you, like any other married couple we've got issues and mom isn't the root of them by any means. She didn't create our issues, me being her caregiver hasn't helped.
My mom hasn't been well for most of her life and has been living with me for over 30 years, she's in her 80's now. She used to be able to manage on her own with little assistance/support but now she is bedridden and needs round the clock care.
I met my husband and got married about 15 years ago. He knew at the time that me and mom were a package deal. She needed care and I was her caregiver. He had no issues at first and moved in with us.
Now it's a totally different story - I think he's jealous of her, my care for her and the time I spend on/with her - everything is "you and your mother". I can't depend on him for any help whatsoever as someone said to me "hey it's not his mom"...... I do understand that but figure that even if he doesn't want to help her, doesn't he want to help me his wife...... I suppose not..... I'm on my own. She can't be left alone so if I have to go out I have to get someone to be with her even if he is at home. Luckily I work from home so I'm basically here with her all the time 24/7.
Me being mom's caregiver has affected our relationship. I'm unable to travel with my husband or go out and socialize with him because I have no one to leave her with. He's gone away on vacation a few times over the years without me. He might mind alot but me not so much. I'm a little anti social and don't mind staying home. As a matter of fact, looking after my mom has given me the perfect excuse to stay home (don't tell him - smile). Not sure how I'll get around this when she's gone....sigh.
Since covid I don't think he's been in my moms room, that's like from March. I don't mind really because even with covid he still likes to go out and he's anti mask and likes to cough and sneeze all over the place. So much so that I wear a mask 90% of the time when I'm at home just because I don't want to get anything from him and pass to her... not covid, not the cold, flu anything. I do ask him to be mindful of the fact that covid or even the flu could be fatal for her but he thinks he's invincible, insensitive and irresponsible and selfish. I'm happy now to keep him away from her to ensure she doesn't get sick.
I suppose I am the good daughter and bad wife..............
The way I see it, mom has been there all my life even when she was ill and could have given up on us. We didn't have a lot growing up but she always made sure we had what we needed and were cared for and loved. Now that she needs me, I will be there for her..... she will always be my mom. He may not always be my husband.............
Mark you, like any other married couple we've got issues and mom isn't the root of them by any means. She didn't create our issues, me being her caregiver hasn't helped.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I thought I had it bad with mom in my home for 15 years but you beat me!
I am so sorry. You have your hands full.
My caregiving days to my mom are over. I had to forgo it all. It became too much. She is now under hospice care and lives with a sibling.
My husband was loving and supportive. He isn’t one to complain much, never has been but I could see relief when mom moved out. It is normal for a spouse to start to resent the situation.
I feel like all marriages take a hit when a parent moves in.
Everything changes and not for the better.
It is never like The Walton’s television show.
I met my husband and got married about 15 years ago. He knew at the time that me and mom were a package deal. She needed care and I was her caregiver. He had no issues at first and moved in with us.
Now it's a totally different story - I think he's jealous of her, my care for her and the time I spend on/with her - everything is "you and your mother". I can't depend on him for any help whatsoever as someone said to me "hey it's not his mom"...... I do understand that but figure that even if he doesn't want to help her, doesn't he want to help me his wife...... I suppose not..... I'm on my own. She can't be left alone so if I have to go out I have to get someone to be with her even if he is at home. Luckily I work from home so I'm basically here with her all the time 24/7.
Me being mom's caregiver has affected our relationship. I'm unable to travel with my husband or go out and socialize with him because I have no one to leave her with. He's gone away on vacation a few times over the years without me. He might mind alot but me not so much. I'm a little anti social and don't mind staying home. As a matter of fact, looking after my mom has given me the perfect excuse to stay home (don't tell him - smile). Not sure how I'll get around this when she's gone....sigh.
Since covid I don't think he's been in my moms room, that's like from March. I don't mind really because even with covid he still likes to go out and he's anti mask and likes to cough and sneeze all over the place. So much so that I wear a mask 90% of the time when I'm at home just because I don't want to get anything from him and pass to her... not covid, not the cold, flu anything. I do ask him to be mindful of the fact that covid or even the flu could be fatal for her but he thinks he's invincible, insensitive and irresponsible and selfish. I'm happy now to keep him away from her to ensure she doesn't get sick.
I suppose I am the good daughter and bad wife..............
The way I see it, mom has been there all my life even when she was ill and could have given up on us. We didn't have a lot growing up but she always made sure we had what we needed and were cared for and loved. Now that she needs me, I will be there for her..... she will always be my mom. He may not always be my husband.............
Mark you, like any other married couple we've got issues and mom isn't the root of them by any means. She didn't create our issues, me being her caregiver hasn't helped.
My two cents.
I met my husband and got married about 15 years ago. He knew at the time that me and mom were a package deal. She needed care and I was her caregiver. He had no issues at first and moved in with us.
Now it's a totally different story - I think he's jealous of her, my care for her and the time I spend on/with her - everything is "you and your mother". I can't depend on him for any help whatsoever as someone said to me "hey it's not his mom"...... I do understand that but figure that even if he doesn't want to help her, doesn't he want to help me his wife...... I suppose not..... I'm on my own. She can't be left alone so if I have to go out I have to get someone to be with her even if he is at home. Luckily I work from home so I'm basically here with her all the time 24/7.
Me being mom's caregiver has affected our relationship. I'm unable to travel with my husband or go out and socialize with him because I have no one to leave her with. He's gone away on vacation a few times over the years without me. He might mind alot but me not so much. I'm a little anti social and don't mind staying home. As a matter of fact, looking after my mom has given me the perfect excuse to stay home (don't tell him - smile). Not sure how I'll get around this when she's gone....sigh.
Since covid I don't think he's been in my moms room, that's like from March. I don't mind really because even with covid he still likes to go out and he's anti mask and likes to cough and sneeze all over the place. So much so that I wear a mask 90% of the time when I'm at home just because I don't want to get anything from him and pass to her... not covid, not the cold, flu anything. I do ask him to be mindful of the fact that covid or even the flu could be fatal for her but he thinks he's invincible, insensitive and irresponsible and selfish. I'm happy now to keep him away from her to ensure she doesn't get sick.
I suppose I am the good daughter and bad wife..............
The way I see it, mom has been there all my life even when she was ill and could have given up on us. We didn't have a lot growing up but she always made sure we had what we needed and were cared for and loved. Now that she needs me, I will be there for her..... she will always be my mom. He may not always be my husband.............
Mark you, like any other married couple we've got issues and mom isn't the root of them by any means. She didn't create our issues, me being her caregiver hasn't helped.
My two cents.
For some, this arrangement works out fairly well and they feel it is the best choice for all concerned.
Please share why this has or has not worked in your situation.
We can all learn from each other’s experiences.
Please be polite and show support for everyone. We are all entitled to our own opinions.
Did you gain something in having a parent live in your home?
What was lost by having a parent live with you?
What surprised you the most about a parent living in your home?
Don’t feel as if you have to answer all of my questions. Share whatever is on your mind.