My 87 year old mother has dementia and has suffered from depression, and worries about EVERYTHING, even though she lives at home with me and is well taken cared of by family. I feel she gave up the will to live life years ago. Doesn't want to do anything, doesn't want to go anywhere. Refuses to go to the Senior Citizen Center even if I accompany her. She wants no part of socializing with people she doesn't know. She has been on various antidepressant medication that haven't seemed to make a difference. She is still very capable, physically of being active. When I can convince her to take a walk with me she can walk approx. 3/4 mile without any difficulty. I have tried to explain the importance of staying active and how lucky she is that she is still very mobile. She always agrees but will not do anything without constant coaxing. It is so very frustrating and exhausting trying to encourage her to do anything. She prefers to sit in a chair and stare. She has no hobbies she likes. I have tried giving her a movie or something to watch on a laptop and most of the time she loses interest. All her meals are prepared for her and she eats pretty well. But I feel like I am beating my head against the wall trying to keep her active and interested in life and not fall into the abyss of this dreadful disease. Bless you all for any advice.
Being uncomfortable in social situations seems to go with cognitive issues too, particularly if the person is aware of their problems. My mother reluctantly attends senior day care because I need to know she is somewhere safe and cared for when I attend my doctor's appointments and run errands. She came home Wednesday telling me how much she had enjoyed talking with a couple of the elderly gentlemen about the community where she grew up. This morning she didn't want to go back so I ask her why and then we go through the whole "you have a good time there" and "I need you to go" conversation again. Ultimately she went out the door looking forward to day care, but we will probably have another morning discussion sometime soon. She will forget this morning's conversation and her fears will return. I try to put myself in her shoes and consider how I would feel if I couldn't trust my own mind.
Playing music from the era she was young and going through old photo books can be very simulating for those with memory problems. Mom loves to identify every person and building in an old photo and tell me each one. We can talk a couple of hours on one old photo. Mom always sang when she worked so now I sing when working around the house and she joins in.
I don't think our seniors really do well learning/adopting entirely new hobbies. If you can find something that is a variation on something they did in their childhoods or pre-cognitive issue days, that seems to be more workable.