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When I was working in California I received a call from home informing me of my mom's condition and I jumped on a flight coming back to Louisiana but I didn't even make it on the plane and was told she passed and my dad passed away about 13 months ago and I found him deceased in his home and I can't find it in my heart to forgive my brother and sister for wanting to sell their house because I refuse to sign them papers giving my permission. If I allow it to happen then it's like I'm losing them all over again.

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A forced sale will happen if it goes to court. Because of legal payments on all 3 people, you will receive much less than you expected. Buck up and buy the place. I have a feeling you are not being honest with us that you have a feasible solution. If you cannot get a loan then move on.
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Reply to MACinCT
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Simple solution to this is you buy the house and you can do with it what you want.
Personal opinion.
It is a building.
You no longer live there. (If you do live there now then it makes sense for you to purchase it)
Is a building giving you any comfort?

they can force the sale.
I have to ask do you want to lose your siblings as well as your parents?
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Reply to Grandma1954
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There are a couple of possibilities here. OP has not been back for 3 days. Sitting back and watching? Gone way away in disgust?

1) First possibility: It’s a scam post. Three blind mice (that’s us), see how they run?
2) Second: OP is not quite sane. The siblings will have to deal with that, as OP has made up his/her mind.
3) It’s intended to make lots of people look up ‘Cuccio’ and go visit the restaurant with that name.

Take your pick.
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Fawnby Mar 13, 2025
The lasagna was great.
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Cuccio3, welcome to the forum. So sorry about your parents. The house I grew up was sold back in 1960's. My Dad was being transferred out of State, so he, Mom and I moved to a wonderful area (I was in my early 20's).


But what if my parents had kept that house, rented it out? And after my folks had passed, what if my parents passed that house onto me? Would I moved into it? Probably not. Reason would have been I wasn't ready to retire and move many States away, had a job I truly enjoyed which I wouldn't have given up for any "house", and friends I would miss. And everyone who had lived in the old neighborhood would have been gone by now. But I am glad I have memories and photos of when I did live in that house :) Just something to think about.
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Reply to freqflyer
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I don't understand the issue. Buy out your siblings. You really can't expect that they never sell the house and it sits vacant. What would be the point?
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AlvaDeer Mar 11, 2025
I think easy enough to say, but the OP may not have the means or the credit to get mortgage, put down a down payment, or buy any home anywhere. Think that this is unique to the person's situation, assets, and etc.
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The only solution to this is that you buy the house.

The other solution is they go to court two against one and get the judge to issue a court order to sell the house. I can tell you this will absolutely happen. Louisiana courts will absolutely side with them. You will have no say.

You have two choices: buy the house or it gets sold anyway.

While I understand you are grieving, selling the house realistically doesn’t mean you are losing your parents all over again. Your grief is clouding your decision making.
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Bulldog54321 Mar 10, 2025
Also, who is the one paying for the crazy expensive Louisiana home owners insurance, wind and hail, and flood insurance? You aren’t getting that back in the sale.
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Buy your siblings out if you are feeling sentimental about the house. Own it yourself and pay the taxes, utilities, insurance and upkeep. It is not fair to impose financial hardship on your siblings because of your sentimentality.

You will also create a rift with your siblings. Relationships are more valuable than things.
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Reply to Hothouseflower
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Didn't read the other posts so sorry if this has been asked. Who is paying the bills on the house? If all of you, thats not fair to the others. If the estate, that too is not fair either. They lose out inheritance because you won't sell. I do understand where your coming from. I had to sell the house I was raised in. I was the only one dealing with cleaning it out and selling it. No one wanted the house. So I had to harden myself. Someone had to do it and no place for sentiments. If you don't plan to live in it, you have to let it go. And, yes, a sale can be forced.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Siblings can force a sale. I’m assume the house is in Louisiana, right?
LA runs slightly differently than other States as we are French law based (I’m in NOLA). Within a Succession in Louisiana, if there is an asset that is undivided interest and an heir is being difficult on having that asset sold, or having it transferred, or whatever to make it difficult for the asset to go through probate, then any of the heirs can file a lawsuit within the probate process against the difficult heir. The suit is to force a partition. They would enjoin the other heirs in their lawsuit, so they are not sued but are a part of the overall suit as they share as a heir.

A forced partition. Partition is called a “licitation” if it is an asset that is undivided interest (like a house, or a boat or a building) or it’s called a “metes” if it’s just land or something that can be divided. The probate atty will file it but will usually have a Real Estate atty doing the paperwork, so this will have seriou$$$ costs. And the difficult heir will be sued to be held responsible for the costs due to your delay. Costs can be expenses to have the house exist but also can be any increase in taxes your siblings incurred due to waiting. It’s really hard to represent yourself in actions like this, so you will need your own attorney with a State of LA license.

if you don’t want it sold, then you have to 100% on your own buy your siblings out.

Again if you want the house, you have to have the cash $ to pay your siblings for their share. You cannot get lending on the house as you do not own it. Louisiana does not - I’m pretty sure - allow for Owelty lien done for partitions. You have to have the cash. And expect your siblings atty to file for you to be responsible for any costs they paid as well as legal fees. Siblings - I imagine - have waited to deal with the house as father was alive and needed his participation. He’s dead & It’s over a year, this is only going to get more & more complicated and expensive and emotional the longer you put this off.
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Bulldog54321 Mar 10, 2025
Yup. OP has no choice here.
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As gently as I can say this - you only have a few options. Especially if your siblings are ready to sell. And if you don't move on with this soon - you may cause more damage than you intend to.

Your siblings can force the sale - it would involve lawyers - but if you don't buy them out of the fair market value of the sale- they can retain a lawyer and force the sale.

My heart goes out to you, it really does. But perhaps it is time for you to consider finding a grief counselor or therapist to help you as well. While I realize that no one can tell you how to grieve or how long to grieve, perhaps your siblings need closure as well.

The other side of the coin is are you the one paying all of the bills on the house? Or are your siblings on the hook for covering the shared costs of keeping the home? We had to force the sale of my FIL's home - not legally because my SIL and her DH didn't have a leg to stand on - but the biggest issue was that they could not afford to pay the monthly bills on the house -and we had our own bills to pay and couldn't afford to maintain two homes any longer.

While you may not agree and believe they should feel the way that you do, your siblings are entitled to their fair share of the home - either via sale or you buying them out. You are holding on to anger with your siblings but honestly - that's not fair to them - perhaps the way they grieve is to close the estate and move forward with their lives?
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Reply to BlueEyedGirl94
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People react differently to loss. Some people find a deceased love one's home and property painful reminders and don't want to keep them because they bring distress, not comfort. Other people keep the memories just as strongly as you do without needing the physical possessions. Don't hold a grudge against your siblings because they react differently from how you do. There is nothing for you to forgive because they aren't doing anything wrong.

If you want to keep the house you need to get a fair market appraisal and buy out their shares. Otherwise they can file a partition lawsuit to require you to pay up or let go. It would be much better to agree now rather than fracturing your relationship with legal action. That would not honor your parents.
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Reply to MG8522
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The house is a building, not your parents. It costs money to maintain it, pay property taxes and homeowners insurance. Parents always want their estate to go to their kids. I lost both my parents, and it's heartbreaking.

Do you expect the empty house to sit there forever, by keeping it from being sold and the equity shared? Did your parents say in their Wills, "never sell our house and let it sit empty forever?" I doubt that.

Everyone handles grief differently. I'm sure finding your Dad was traumatic. But holding onto a vacant house and being so unforgiving to your siblings isn't what your Dad would have wanted. He would want you all to inherit what he had and accept his generous gift, a chance to get ahead in your lives!

You will eventually heal from this tragedy, but it will take time. You may need counseling, since 13 months has gone by and you are still unable to forgive your siblings or give permission to sell the house. They did not cause your Dad's passing. The reality is that we all die. Nobody lives on Earth forever.

What would your Dad tell you? To hold a grudge over your siblings from loosing him? To refuse the gift of his estate and prevent all of you from getting a life changing opportunity he wanted you ALL to have?

Sorry for your loss. I hope you cooperate and sell it.
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Reply to Dawn88
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What is it that you want to happen? The parents aren't coming back. If you want the house, you must buy out your siblings. If you can't, that is not their fault. Things are not people. Please see a therapist to help you with your complicated grief. Do not sacrifice the relationship you have with your living relatives over your inability to let go of a symbol of your deceased parents.
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Reply to ShirleyDot
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Go get a mortgage and buy your siblings out of their share of the inheritance, then you can do whatever you want with the house, live in it, make it a shrine or whatever.

If your siblings were here asking about this situation, I would tell them to take you to court to force the sale.

Just curious, do you have guilt that you didn't even live in the same state and that is holding you back from moving forward in your life? If you do, you shouldn't, kids grow up and move on with their goals and dreams and that often puts them many miles away. As a parent, I want my kids to be them best selves, wherever that may take them, no doubt, your parents wanted the same for their children.
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igloo572 Mar 16, 2025
“make it a shrine”. OMGhow did it miss this! Chefs kiss emoji 2u, Real.
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It's just a house at this point and not your parents home anymore. And your memories of your parents will be with you forever, regardless of what happens to the house.
Life moves on and often a sale of a property must be done in the best interest of all involved. Again it is just a house at this point and not your parents home.
Perhaps it would do you some good to seek out some grief counseling to help you work through your unhealthy view of this situation. Grief Share is a free support group that meets in pretty much every city, so you can Google to see where one is near you.
And in case you didn't already know this, unforgiveness only hurts you and no one else, so I hope you can come to some sort of peace about the house that your parents once lived in being sold.
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Cuccio3 Mar 9, 2025
Well it's just not a home and it's my parents home now and forever and I'm sry if I disagree with you
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Sign the papers to sell the house. Receive your share then you don't have to ever deal with your siblings again, if that's what you want. But you seem to want to punish them eternally, which IMO is immature and probably not something that your parents would want you to do. As a parent myself I'd be so very disappointed if my sons behaved like that -- I don't care what reason they had to justify it to themselves.

I'm sorry for the painful loss of your parents. But no one gets to stay here forever. Maybe consider therapy to work through your grief, so that you can do it in a healthier way, and also identify and defend boundaries with your other family. I wish you clarity, wisdom and peace in your heart as you move forward.
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Reply to Geaton777
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Cuccio,
What are your plans for the home?
Do you plan to live there?
An unoccupied home, as you can imagine, deteriorates fast. Moreover insurance companies often will drop insurance on an unoccupied home.

The Will, if one is written, and the Executor of said Will are often important stipulations as well. Often a Will of Trust will dictate exactly what is to happen; for instance "Home at 716 Broadmoor is to be sold, and the assets there of added to the liquid assets of the estate, to be divided three ways between..................." and blah-blah.

Now, if this home is left intestate, that is to say no will, then an administrator will be appointed, the home would be sold, all assets drawn into one account and divided according to stipulations of a home.

Let us surmise that parent left the home "divided into three equal portions" and blah blah. A home that is owned by more than one person can almost always be FORCED legally into a sale, simply by the wish of one or more owning it to sell it.

If you would like options, go to see an attorney in your area.
I am very sorry for your loss, but I know you understand, much as you love the house, if you cannot "buy out" your siblings, it will likely be sold. Your parents are still with you, now in memories that you carry within. Your mom, gone so long, I am sure can still be felt a presence in your life. Your Dad's loss is so recent, and so much more acute.

I wish you good luck, and give you my condolences on your loss.
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Cuccio3 Mar 9, 2025
I'm in the home right now and I'm trying to get the money together to buy my siblings out because in the will the house is left to my siblings and myself and I don't know how to let go of it
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The house is not your parents. The memories are your parents. The anger at your siblings is only harming you. The love you remember is your parents. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself for it frees you to move forward. This is what your parents would want for you. I’m sorry for your losses, I’ve lost both my parents as well and know the pain. I personally sold their home, one they’d built with love. The house would have only been a sad shell, I have a gift of great memories that far surpasses any house. I wish you healing and peace
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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My sincere condolences on the loss of your parents. I'm so sorry.

Look, being stubborn won't bring them back. Your brother and sister are doing nothing wrong. Selling the parents' house is the most common-sensible plan. If you don't sell it, the house sits there and moulders, costs a lot of money to maintain, or if someone does live there (as in renting it from the family), the house will be changed anyway. A house is just a house. Your emotions about it are real, but your thinking about those emotions is wrong. You won't forgive brother and sister for wanting to do the most sensible thing? That would get the burden of the house off of all of you? And bring money into the family?

If you keep on with this, brother and sister may not forgive YOU. Please stop thinking of the house as being your parents. They are gone. The house will be enjoyed by another family; that's what a house is for. I hope you'll sign and move on with your life because that's definitely what's best for all of you.
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