They do everything together and she controls his time with needing to go to the store, hair, every errand, then she has to eat at exactly five o'clock and up at 6. I am getting used to the schedule although mine was different but she is very critical of everything I do, she talks under her breath when I am around, called me lazy the first day and he acts like I should just jump in and start cleaning or helping her and when I do she tells me she doesn't need help or something and it's very awkward now when I am around her. On almost every date night we have Mom along and if she's not happy about something then look out. I give her no reason to not like m, I am cordial and am really trying to be nice but now I feel like I want to avoid her because she makes me feel so uncomfortable and if I am to be with him, I have to get along with her but I can't read between the lines of either of them in what I should be doing around the house. I have offered and stepped in and she just huffs. On top of that he told me she reads all my texts and I told him those are personal and why and he said because he doesn't keep anything from her. Help I really like him, but I think he is afraid of losing her and since she is 90 wants to take care of her because he feels obligated and I see he is very stressed and needs help around his house with cleaning and cooking and such but not sure where or when to jump in I am not lazy by far but when I am with him on his off days or nights from work and weekends I don't really want to clean someone else's house and take over the chauffeuring which I don't really mind, but have a hard time getting around to a date without her and trying to get him to show his mother I am an important person in his life too.
Actually, he’s already married to his mom and they’ve made you their willing and sympathetic servant. Yes, SERVANT. Your boyfriend doesn’t really love you. No one treats someone he loves the way BF treats you. I foresee nothing but misery in this for you. Walk away while you can. You’re better off alone rather than in this sad and miserable arrangement. I wish you luck, but hopefully not with this loser.
No, you do not need to clean for either of them. The mother resents you being around, so if I were in your shoes, I would not hang around where I'm not wanted.
Your boyfriend doesn't seem like the type to place you and your relationship as a priority. Do not make other people a priority when they treat you like an option.
No disrespect to Oedipus, but let him continue to date his mother. You go live your life even if it is no more than sitting in your living room enjoying a good movie while having a snack.
This isn’t about him feeling obligated . This is most likely the relationship they have always had .
Don’t clean a thing and Dump him . Learn about what a healthy relationship is .
dump him today.
Don't take him back for any reason.
He's a fixer-upper that requires too much sweat equity.
You can find better.
If he invites you to spend the night at their hotel, run like hell.
If this is HIS house. Move out.
If this is HER house Move out.
YOU are not important to him. You are not a priority in his life.
Actually it is a good thing that you have found this out now.
And PLEASE do NOT have children with this mommas boy.
Just the issue of bf showing mommie dearest the text messages between him and the OP should be enough to send anyone running for cover!