Last night my husband came home from the office looking like a ghost. I asked him, “What’s wrong?”
He told me that one of his staff had not been to work since last week, was on emergency PTO. My husband was aware that she had been dealing with her elderly parents refusing to go to a facility or doctors and they kept firing hired caregivers. She assumed they had dementia, living in a somewhat hoarded house as well. She had no luck with APS.
Yesterday, HR informed my husband that she had emailed that she felt she was not doing her job well enough anymore due to family caregiving problems and was resigning immediately. She also committed suicide.
There needs to be a better way of releasing caregivers from these situations.
She previously had to leave an abusive husband and was living in a homeless shelter when my husband hired her a few years ago .
The woman had been through a lot .
As long as parents exert guilt and don’t let go of stubbornness and entitlement there is no solutions.
I feel enormous sympathy for every woman, yes, if I remember correctly 60% or more of caregivers are women aged 40-60 and beyond.
And how many on this forum write happy stories about caregiving?
It is always about guilt, they are not good enough, don’t do enough. Etc. etc.
Maybe guilt is a root of all evil.
Sad
A cautionary tale, to be sure.
It really emphasizes how people should reach out to each other they know who are dealing with caregiving. Lots of times we assume someone will reach out if they need help. But that obviously is not the case.